Moms: Do you “should” on yourself?

If you are a mom, you have days where you feel exhausted and unmotivated. (Some of you everyday?)  Well, if those types of days have been around more often than not, I encourage you to look at how much you “should” on yourself.

How many times per day do you think things like:

“I should have the house clean by now”

“I should have lost the baby weight already”

“I should be exercising”

“I should have more motivation”

“I should be more productive”

You can probably add 100 more items to this list. We put intense pressure on ourselves daily with these type of thoughts. It can become very exhausting to never feel “good enough”. That is the underlying message to yourself using “should”.

Here is my challenge to you in three steps:

1: Start by becoming aware of your “shoulds”

  • Write them down. The first step to changing your mindset is awareness.


  • As a mother, please look at all you do on a daily basis. It is a lot. If something gets left undone, or you have a couple extra pounds hanging on, it does not make your worth decrease.

3: Stop shoulding on yourself for a whole week

  • Any time you hear one in your mind, challenge it. For example replace “I should have lost the baby weight by now” with “I am worthy as I am. I have my life ahead of me to accomplish my goals.”  OR replace “I should have the house cleaned by now” with “I was able to clean the kitchen today. I will focus on the laundry tomorrow.”


By changing your mindset and rewording “shoulds” to positive statements, you may find your motivation returning.

This quote from Brene Brown sums it up:

“No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It’s going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging.”
Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are